I finally feel like I’m in a place in my life where I don’t have a lot of the ‘go to’ resolutions. I’m happy with my fitness (especially after having a baby, I was lucky to be able to continue running and it paid off), I’m starting to save more money, we eat healthy and organic (for the most part), I have a challenging job and we’ve started a family. These things didn’t happen overnight. The past decade has been trial and mostly error, realizing the kind of life I want by living the kind of life I didn’t.
I hadn’t really thought much about New Year’s resolutions until the baby fell asleep our flight back to Charleston, I didn’t feel like paying 8$ for wifi, but needed to occupy my brain with something other than really wanting lunch. These are the things I came up with, new types of resolutions for an older me, resolutions that don’t have to be accomplished in 365 days, but are things I want to integrate into the next years of our lives.
Be Charitable: If the south has taught me anything, it’s the importance of charity. Not necessarily with money (although we should be doing that too), but being helpful and gracious. It’s seeing people who need a hand, whether it’s a meal or help with groceries, and instead of avoiding their gaze, meeting it. The other day I was walking out of a pizza place with a large pizza in one hand and the baby in the other and this kid, probably 18, said he was hungry and asked for money for a burrito. I don’t know his situation, if he was actually hungry or was after drug money, but I didn’t have any cash and I’m not sure I would have given him any if I did. I felt bad the rest of the night, and I wish I had at least given him a slice of pizza, especially knowing it was for two girls who definitely couldn’t put it away.
Spend time with my husband: Between our insane schedules, we don’t spend any quality adult time together. Adult meaning dinner without a high chair or a movie in a theater, not to fall asleep on the couch to. I need a reason to wear something other than work or workout clothes.
Let go of people baggage: I was recently having lunch with a friend and she mentioned an ex she saw on Facebook who is now dating someone I was always suspicious of. I felt totally vindicated. But as much as I love a little juice, I’ve learned (in more recent years) it’s healthiest to let go of people that bring you down, create stress, or are emotionally exhausting. Life has gotten a lot easier since I’ve become more selective with my friendships, and I want to continue that pattern. If it’s not a two way street, I’m not traveling it.
Keep the good ones: These are the friends that you love for being themselves, that you don’t need to talk to everyday, that you want to succeed more than anything. These friendships have gotten me through a lot, and even though they’re mostly long distance, I want to put an emphasis on keeping them, especially as we build families and grow older. There’s something irreplaceable about knowing someone since middle school, having gone to college together, or having so many inside jokes that that’s all you talk about for an entire weekend (no matter how annoyed your husbands get).
Think about the future: Is this the career I see myself in in ten years? How long are we going to wait between kids? Can we actually retire on what we’re saving? I hate thinking that about these things, they’re boring and they remind me how old I am. But it’s easy to get comfortable. And I don’t want to look back and wish I had had more foresight.
Signatures: These are the trivial things. I’ve always wanted a signature scent (I’m gravitating towards flowery), or a dish that I always bring to parties (assuming I go to parties). Something that my kids or friends will remember me by.
Finally, Fitness: My world revolves around two things, my baby and my workout schedule. To me, working out doesn’t necessarily mean staying thin, but being healthy and quieting the crazy that builds up in my head. For over 15 years I’ve called myself a runner, but it hasn’t been until the last several years that running has truly changed my life. We did our first ultra marathon two years ago, a 50 mile trail run in the Marion National Forest in South Carolina. I’ve been thinking about it ever since and wanting to do another. I love the ultra experience and the ultra community. It’s full of crazy people, and we fit right in.
And, here are some blogs that motivate me everyday to live a healthier, happier and more passionate life.
Cupcakes and Cashmere (her socal style makes me miss home)
A Little Bit of Lacquer (She’s a fellow Smithie!)
Happy New Year!